Why I Still Believe !

By Leslie Green 5/5/02

Have you ever heard the expression it was love at first sight? Well that's exactly what it was for me. I knew the moment that I saw Lionel that one day I would be his wife. I couldn't quite put my finger on why I was so sure but my gut instinct and heartstrings all seemed to pull in a thousand ways every time we were together. 

From the very beginning we became the best of friends. We went everywhere and did everything together and before we knew it, we were saying I do at a wedding chapel in Las Vegas. The bright lights of Vegas couldn't compare to the illumination that I felt on that day. I wish that there were a way to bottle or capture the feelings that I felt. It's not because I don't feel that joy today, but because I'd like to experience again the moment when God first gave me a little piece of heaven. 

As we began our life together we quickly came to the realization that marriage is more than wearing a ring and having a piece of paper that says we are married. In the same way we worked at getting the attention of one another in the beginning, we had to put that same energy into becoming one flesh. Even though we were now Mr. & Mrs.Green, we didn't have a clue on how to be husband and wife. Together we had to learn that the key to having a successful marriage is to be firmly committed to living our lives according to the word of God. I can't begin to tell you how hard it was to let go of stubborn pride, bad habits, and worldly ways. Those things almost destroyed our marriage. 

We quite often were too focused on pleasing ourselves instead of first pleasing God in order to then please each other. We had to stop thinking and trying to live as individuals instead of husband and wife. I believe that once we took the first steps towards seeking God in our marriage that He began to show us some things that we thought would never be possible. I prayed that God would change me to be the wife that He wanted me to be. I prayed that He would teach me to be submissive and to tame my tongue. I also prayed that God would touch my husband's heart and inspire him to have the desire to be a Godly husband.

-And once again, God heard and answered my prayers! He began to put Godly people in our paths, gave us Mt. Calvary for a church home, and the desire to continue to seek Him. We began to study the bible together, pray together, and come together as one.

One of the first things we did was start taking marriage enrichment classes and workshops. Most recently, the Keeping Your Marriage Covenant Classes. I am so proud of my husband for not only wanting to take the classes, but completing them. There were several occasions when we were getting ready for class and the enemy would try to keep us from going. We would be having a perfect day and then all of a sudden we'd find ourselves bickering over something silly. Notice how I just said something instead of telling you what the problems were? It's because they were so petty that I don't even remember. Anyway, we caught on fast to the enemy's plan to destroy our joy and we fought him all the way. 

God recognized our commitment to enhancing our marriage and gave us the strength to persevere. It is so amazing how God continues to show Lionel and I how beautiful marriage can be. It doesn't have to be like the negative portrayals that the world speaks of. Of course there are going to be trials and we certainly have had and will have our share. Our defense is putting on the full armour of God when we are being tested by trails and weapons that are formed against us.

I am so grateful that God has blessed me with a husband who did not ignore the call when the Holy Spirit began speaking to his heart. The Bible tells us that a good wife is like a gem, and I say that when a good wife receives her Godly husband, that he is more precious than a million diamonds. I praise God and commend my husband for continuously striving to be a Godly man. No matter what trials we go through and how hopeless the situation gets, Lionel is the first one to tell me to have faith and trust in the Lord.

I don't know why it is hard at times to trust in the Lord for all of our needs. Especially when I've seen how He can miraculously work things out. Not only does He work things out, but a lot of the times He restores them to better condition than they were in the first place. I must say that no matter how hard marriage gets and how much the world will try to tear us apart, I know that God can keep us together. Just knowing that God will always keep His promises, I know that we can make it. I will always feel confident in saying over and over again, "I still do."